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Bktrax-Disc-Why I Stayed (Unabridged) (8 CD)
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$ 25.49
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| Retail Value |
$ 29.99 |
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$ 4.50 (15%) |
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| Item Number |
705814 |
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Item Description...
Overview
On November 2, 2006, Gayle Haggard?s life changed forever when her husband, Ted Haggard, founder of the 14,000-member New Life Church in Colorado Springs and president of the National Association of Evangelicals, was publicly exposed in a scandal. In the days and months ahead, everything in Gayle?s life was at stake?her beliefs, her marriage, and her relationship with the church community she had been a part of for more than 20 years. In Why I Stayed, Gayle walks us through the choices she made in her darkest hour and shares her renewed passion for the central message of the Bible?the liberating message of forgiveness and love. Why I Stayed reminds us of what less-than-perfect people desperately need?a community of family and faith that offers healing love and a path to restoration
Publishers Description
On November 2, 2006, Gayle Haggard's life changed forever when her husband, Ted Haggard, founder of the 14,000-member New Life Church in Colorado Springs and president of the National Association of Evangelicals, was publicly exposed in a scandal. In the days and months ahead, everything in Gayle's life was at stake--her beliefs, her marriage, and her relationship with the church community she had been a part of for more than 20 years. In "Why I Stayed," Gayle walks us through the choices she made in her darkest hour and shares her renewed passion for the central message of the Bible--the liberating message of forgiveness and love. "Why I Stayed" reminds us of what less-than-perfect people desperately need--a community of family and faith that offers healing love and a path to restoration.
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Item Specifications...
Dimensions: Length: 0.75" Width: 5.5" Height: 6.75"
Weight: 0.5 lbs.
Binding CD
Release Date Jan 1, 2010
Publisher Tyndale House Publishers
ISBN 1414335865
EAN 9781414335865
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Availability 19 units.
Availability accurate as of May 25, 2012 04:07.
Usually ships within one to two business days from New Kensington, PA.
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Reviews - What do our customers think?
 | Excellent inspiring read May 26, 2010 |
I found this book to be an eye opener and changed the way i think about forgiveness and the character it takes to practice the things that God wants us to be.
| | |  | An Infuriatingly Selfish Spin on a Serious Sinner's Story May 23, 2010 |
This story, by the wife of exposed liar, hypocrite and drug-user Ted Haggard, is a frustrating view of how well-meaning Christians see everything in life selfishly, even when they commit terrible sin.
She jumps right into the problems of the marriage, not wasting a couple hundred pages telling readers about her upbringing. Instead she starts with meeting her husband and quickly goes through their years of building their Colorado ministry into a mega-church.
She fills these early pages with self-centered emotion, never stopping to ask obvious questions like why she broke up an engagement with another guy for this man she didn't like at first. Or why a man who had never led a church decides to pick up and move far away and start a church from scratch. Or why they sent away their mentally disabled son to Kentucky when they had been told it was best for him to live at home. So early on she exposes a lack of self-perception that becomes even more clear once the scandal is exposed.
Most shocking is her writing about the days when Haggard revealed he had done drugs (it's confirmed here even though he continued to claim publicly it wasn't true) and had a homosexual affair. She again goes inside her emotions and immediately starts to try to save her marriage, her family and her job (she was getting paid to be a women's leader at the church her husband pastured). Instead of realizing that what her husband did was a lengthy breech of rust with her or his gigantic church, she callously responds that she thinks the people in the church should sympathize with him since he has now proven that he's not perfect and is a sinner, just like his followers.
Then, after she claims complete devastation, they get the family on a plane for a lengthy stay at a Florida beach home--and on the plane she claims her husband tells her "everything." This is on a commercial flight--with hundreds of people around her, including her kids. Why would she talk about private things in public just a few days after being held to national ridicule? And how could she believe him as he tells her that he slept with other men but "didn't have sex" with them and only masturbated himself while in bed with another guy? Some of this is hard to swallow.
To make it even worse, after she begs us and their followers for compassion, she then admits that she had known for 20 years about his same-sex impulses but chose to ignore them. Early in their marriage he confessed to going to an adult bookstore and having a "physical relationship" with a man, to the point that Haggard feared when their son was born handicapped that it may have been caused by a sexual disease Ted acquired. How could this woman just pretend like this didn't happen and for years believe the guy? This really is a story of how dumb a spouse can be--instead of trusting him she should have been skeptical from that moment on. Faith without works is dead.
It isn't until half way into the book that she reveals he suddenly recalled in post-crisis counseling that he was physically abused at age seven, and that he "experimented" with other boys in sixth and seventh grade. And that he looked at gay porn early in their marriage. This was a much more serious issue than they have claimed publicly and she never seems to have been concerned with any of his past.
Much of her acceptance of her husband is due to her constant hunger for connection with him. Since she was a military child that moved around a lot, she lacked many relationships. She says that even her connection with her husband during their marriage was less than what she needed. So when he sinned and began pouring out his insides to her, she loved it because it was finally the connection she needed! His sins resulted in her needs being fulfilled, so she doesn't take his sins as being that bad.
Gayle even has the gall to condemn and blame the church for not being more forgiving of her husband, preaching about how a true church family would help restore him so he could lead them again. It's all me-me-me and few thoughts about how her husband destroyed the faith of many, as well as made Christianity a joke due to his many faults.
The book ends up being about how she thinks the church should be more forgiving of fallen leaders. She actually writes, after they were told to stay away from their church, "our exile didn't make sense in light of New Testament teachings." Huh? The post-resurrection believers who publicly sinned were very publicly punished (like the couple that lied to the apostles about selling land for the community and were struck dead for lying). The New Testament says you shouldn't even eat with a so-called brother who sins. She keeps repeating the verse about restoring a brother who sins--yet this guy didn't just simply commit a sin, he repeatedly for years deceived tens of thousands of people as the leader of the national evangelical group. He should have repented and used his failure to help others, as Chuck Colson has so brilliantly done in starting a prison ministry after going to jail for Watergate.
This family lived a well-off lifestyle paid for by churchgoers, which Ted must have expected since she admits he grew up in a wealthy family. They lived in a wooded home with a pool and private gate. The church paid for their expenses for over a year--include car, cell phone and insurance. They got a nice severance package and their son's private education was continued to be paid for. They got to stay for free in the beach house. The church even paid for their private lawyer after the scandal was exposed!
After the church paid for their expensive three weeks of counseling in Phoenix, the professionals point blank say that she is the one with major problems and that the couple was acting "like royalty." Even one of her three best friends abandons her after hearing the truth--and yet Gayle never accept responsibility and instead focuses on how terribly people are treating her.
Then she complains that they have to start to pay for things themselves and friends abandoned them. For instance, Ted admitted privately to her that he also had relations with a guy in the church, then she complains that the church leaders are on a "witch hunt" to find if there are others who were abused in the church. The church's logical reaction to his confessions are slammed by her as being "unbiblical." She also condemns virtually every person Ted had personally put in authority over them to keep them accountable--when the church board and the restoration team lay the resolutions on the line after reviewing the evidence, Gayle point blank rejects every bit of it. There is virtually no person in this book who comes away unscathed by her attacks other than her family.
She gets to the point where she is whining that they aren't being treated respectfully--so instead of her worrying about the damage her husband has done to the thousands of followers, she complains that their pictures and books have been removed from the church! This woman's ego is so huge--like other fallen preacher couples (Jim & Tammy Faye Bakker, Jimmy & Frances Swaggart, etc.), she sees she and her husband as the victims instead of focusing on the tragedy they both contributed to.
This should have been a story that begged forgiveness and wallowed in humble sadness. Instead it's defiant, rebellious to any spiritual authority, naive and reflects a distorted gospel. She wants sympathy and wants everyone to believe she and her husband are something they're not. She still has not learned the lesson she needs to learn and the book will only infuriate those looking for a peaceful resolution to this tragedy.
| | | | Not what I expected May 21, 2010 |
| I enjoyed the read, but felt that the book was more about presenting the side of the story they lived in. i wished there had been more chapters about where her heart was, and what God was doing in their lives, and "why she stayed", etc., than the way they saw the situation. I understand those things are tightly wrapped together, but most of the book I felt was more about getting people aware of what happened on their side. | | | | Any spirituality collection will find this eye-opening and revealing May 17, 2010 |
WHY I STAYED: THE CHOICES I MADE IN MY DARKEST HOUR tells of a wife who heard on the radio the first accusations against her pastor husband for using illegal drugs and having a three-year homosexual affair with him. WHY I STAYED explains her revelations, decisions, and how her very beliefs were put on the line by her husband's actions. Any spirituality collection will find this eye-opening and revealing.
| | | | courageous May 13, 2010 |
| Though I share none of the same struggles, this book was such a blessing to me. Anyone's walk with Christ, shared from the heart, is a blessing. Thank You and let the negativity roll off your back. Be the duck!! | | | Write your own review about Bktrax-Disc-Why I Stayed (Unabridged) (8 CD)
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